FAQ
Frequently Asked Questions. Over the past five years of having a stoma, I've noticed there's particular things that people always ask, and then there's the odd question that makes me stop and ask them "what the fuck made you think of that".
The thing I by far get asked the most is if I can control when my stoma poo's. I can't. I can't even feel it on a good day. Anyone that knows me will have noticed that I touch my left side a lot, because it's the only way I can know if I need to empty my bag. Oh, this also means I can't control when it farts. Part of me thinks that maybe it can control that, because it only ever happens at the most inconvenient times, and not when I'm sat alone in my room. Samwise is a bit of a dick. I once had to give a big presentation at uni in front of everyone, and as soon as I stood up to do it and everyone went quiet, it did the loudest fart I've literally ever heard come from it. Most of the people there wouldn't have even known I had a stoma, so it was a bit awkward to explain. I tried to play it cool, but it probably didn't work. Definitely known as that girl who did that fart. But that's fine, I got a 1st on the presentation. Maybe they felt sorry for me?
Something that I've never been asked by anyone without a stoma, but asked myself when I found out I needed one, and have been asked by other people waiting to have one, is whether or not you can smell it. You can't. I mean, when you empty it into the toilet it smells just as bad as anyone else's shit, but whilst it's in the bag there's literally no smell. The bag itself has filters on to stop this. I can honestly say that not once in five years have I ever smelt it whilst it was still in the bag. Something I always find slightly amusing though is that dependant on what you eat, it smells totally different. Chinese take away? Damn right it smells the same coming back out.
I often get asked about how you change a bag. I intended to do a full post about this at some point, as there's an unlimited amount of funny anecdotes surrounding mishaps with this situation... So briefly, a stoma bag works because there's an adhesive layer on the back with a small circular hole in the centre. You cut this hole to the size of your stoma, and then stick the bag down over your stoma. There's a lot of different types of stoma bag available, and a lot of extra products that people opt to use, or need to use dependant on their stoma. It's a really quick process, shouldn't take more than five minutes. Personally I have to change it daily, as my skin reacts badly to the adhesive if it's left on their too long, but the standard is 3-5 days. Which sounds incredible and I wish I could get away with this!
I think I'll leave this here for now, and at a later point I'll write a second FAQ post with more stuff in. Also if anyone has any questions then I'd happily add them in, no matter what it is.
Love and shit x
P.S, just did a massive fart. Woke the dog up. He's not happy with me.
The thing I by far get asked the most is if I can control when my stoma poo's. I can't. I can't even feel it on a good day. Anyone that knows me will have noticed that I touch my left side a lot, because it's the only way I can know if I need to empty my bag. Oh, this also means I can't control when it farts. Part of me thinks that maybe it can control that, because it only ever happens at the most inconvenient times, and not when I'm sat alone in my room. Samwise is a bit of a dick. I once had to give a big presentation at uni in front of everyone, and as soon as I stood up to do it and everyone went quiet, it did the loudest fart I've literally ever heard come from it. Most of the people there wouldn't have even known I had a stoma, so it was a bit awkward to explain. I tried to play it cool, but it probably didn't work. Definitely known as that girl who did that fart. But that's fine, I got a 1st on the presentation. Maybe they felt sorry for me?
Something that I've never been asked by anyone without a stoma, but asked myself when I found out I needed one, and have been asked by other people waiting to have one, is whether or not you can smell it. You can't. I mean, when you empty it into the toilet it smells just as bad as anyone else's shit, but whilst it's in the bag there's literally no smell. The bag itself has filters on to stop this. I can honestly say that not once in five years have I ever smelt it whilst it was still in the bag. Something I always find slightly amusing though is that dependant on what you eat, it smells totally different. Chinese take away? Damn right it smells the same coming back out.
I often get asked about how you change a bag. I intended to do a full post about this at some point, as there's an unlimited amount of funny anecdotes surrounding mishaps with this situation... So briefly, a stoma bag works because there's an adhesive layer on the back with a small circular hole in the centre. You cut this hole to the size of your stoma, and then stick the bag down over your stoma. There's a lot of different types of stoma bag available, and a lot of extra products that people opt to use, or need to use dependant on their stoma. It's a really quick process, shouldn't take more than five minutes. Personally I have to change it daily, as my skin reacts badly to the adhesive if it's left on their too long, but the standard is 3-5 days. Which sounds incredible and I wish I could get away with this!
I think I'll leave this here for now, and at a later point I'll write a second FAQ post with more stuff in. Also if anyone has any questions then I'd happily add them in, no matter what it is.
Love and shit x
P.S, just did a massive fart. Woke the dog up. He's not happy with me.
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